Do’s and Don’t’s of Online Dating

Online dating comes with its own set of risks and rules, apart from traditional dating. When dating online you have to create an interesting profile, keep conversations stimulating, and know how to navigate without cues from the other person’s body language.

Do’s

  • Know what you’re looking for
    • It’s important to know what you want. If you go online and just join any old website, you may wind up on a casual encounters website while looking for a relationship. If this happens, you won’t find what you’re looking for! Before you sign up for any accounts, be sure to define what you want. There are apps and websites for casual sex, friends with benefits, dating, serious relationships, affairs, and so much more!
  • Know where to look
    • This goes hand in hand with my last tip. You have to know what you’re looking for in order to know where to look. Don’t look for casual sex on a website aimed at people looking for relationships!
  • Interesting profile
    • At the very least, list what you’re looking for on your profile and a couple of facts about yourself. On my dating profile I provide a handful of facts about myself and give the reader a topic to contact me with. I adore puns, so on my profile, I point out that the reader can send me one and I’ll definitely reply! If you don’t give readers something to reply or relate to on your profile, you’re not likely to get any messages.
  • Stimulating conversation
    • This seems to be the biggest issue with online dating! While starting casual salutation like hi or hello are common, you need to be able to keep the conversation going after exchanging greetings! Ask questions and always try to reply with at least 2 sentences. If they don’t give you much to reply to, move on. Unless you’re looking for casual sex, in which case, no talking could be a great thing.
  • When to ask for alternative communication/ask out
    • This is the trickiest part of online dating. Without cues from body language to go off of, you don’t know when the person you are conversing with is comfortable enough with you to ask for their number or for a date. Usually people get uncomfortable if you do this immediately, but may lose interest if you wait too long. Try to aim for doing this on day 2 or 3 of chatting, if you feel comfortable with the person.

Don’t’s

  • Blank profile
    • If you don’t give people something to start a conversation with, it will be difficult for them to message you. Again, just try to put something on your profile. Even if it’s just your favorite color or a joke. Leaving your profile blank will look lazy and boring. I met a guy who’s profile just said ‘Talented.’ This made for a great conversation starter!
  • Group pictures
    • If your main or all of your pictures are of you in a group, people will get irritated with trying to figure out if you’re the cute on or not. The only time this is okay is if the group you are in are all cute dogs. Just don’t.
  • Be pushy
    • If someone says they don’t want to give you their number, go out on a date, or talk about a certain topic, don’t push! This is irritating and many people take it as a red flag. Being pushy will get you ghosted faster than anything!
  • Unsolicited inappropriate pictures
    • I can’t believe I still have to advise against this! Unless specifically asked for, do not send nudes. It can be disorienting, inappropriate timing, or just a big turn off. This tactic never works. Don’t do it.

Congratulations! Now you can successfully navigate the online dating world. By following these simple tips and just being you, you’ll have an inbox full of messages in no time!

Clever Ice Breakers for Online Dating

Starting a conversation online can be intimidating. A simple ‘hello’ may get ignored, but a ‘you’re sexy I want to xyz’ can get you reported. You don’t want to come on too strong, just like you don’t want a weak opener.

When striking up a conversation with a stranger that you’ve only just matched with, you want to stand out and entice a reply. The first step to picking the perfect opening line is to read their profile. If they seem to have a sense of humor, open with a joke. If the profile lists some of their hobbies or interests, ask about those. But your first step should always be reading their profile.

The second step to a clever ice breaker is to actually send it. I find that I get nervous about the quality of my ice breaker and dwell on sending it for a while. Don’t be like me, just suck it up and send it! It’s probably a great opening line. No matter wether you are looking for a fuck in Dublin, another casual encounter in Ireland or a serious relationship. Icebreakers will do!

A great ice breaker compliments the receiver, elicits a reaction, or asks a question. Here are some ice breakers that I have found to be very effective.

Are you looking to hookup?

What is your spirit animal? [Their answer] Mine is whatever animal has sex with a [their answer]

If they mention they like a TV show, ask them if they’re coming over soon to watch it and make out.
Fuck, marry, kill. Me, hitler, me again.
I’m not wearing any panties and I have the socks to match!
If a fat guy grabs you and stuffs you in a bag, don’t freak out! I told Santa I wanted you for Christmas.

Or are looking for something deeper?

Pineapple of pizza, yes or no? Or really just any menial controversial topic like this. This line also sets you up to ask them out for pizza.
[Dating app/website] says we’re a match! Does this mean we’re exclusive now?
Life or death decision: [insert an option like cats or dogs, peanut butter or Nutella, etc]
How much does a fat penguin weigh? Enough to break the ice!
You seem like someone I’d like to get to know better, how about we talk about it over dinner?
These ice breakers are certain to get a response. Just make sure you’re using one that fits what you and they are looking for! You don’t want to piss someone off by sending something crude if they aren’t looking or something casual.

Online-Dating Across Boundaries: Can Love Bring Countries Together?

We have all heard it before “long distance relationships never last.” Why is that? Why do people not even want to give it a chance or be happy for your new found relationship? Why do people automatically resort to “it won’t work out” when you mention your new happy long distance relationship? The answer is simple: lack of trust. You can say it’s because you don’t get to see one another often or because the time difference is too much or even the biggest lie ‘no sex.’ These are all ridiculous reasons, hiding the real reason behind why people can’t handle long distance relationships, says Dating Advisor UK.

With today’s technology, you can see one another via skype, get off together with sex toys like the Kiiroo, and stay in touch all day through text messages or facebook. Not seeing one another physically as often as you’d like just makes it all that much more special when you do get to see one another.

Then there is the time difference. Of course this can be a legitimate problem, but it’s one that even couples who live together face! You can work 1st shift and your live-in partner work 3rd and you never see one another. It’s if you want to make time for one another. Set aside an hour or two to spend on facebook together or arrange a weekly skype dinner/movie date. This ‘issue’ really just comes down to wanting to make time for one another.

Whether it is just a hookup or a serious relationship: Lack of sex? Really? I have found so many sex toys for long distance couples. Toys that one can control while the other uses. Toys that replicate the other’s motions and pressure. I understand that there isn’t as much intimacy in this, but if you truly love and care for the person, you can make this work!

Long distance relationships fail because people do not trust one another. More likely they are looking for a fuck buddy. You do not trust that your partner really is just going out with some friends for a drink, you don’t trust that they can abstain from sex, you can’t trust yourself. Getting over this trust issue will take a lot of talking, but if you love the person, you can love across state lines, oceans, even all the way around the world. Love knows no boundaries.